I've been on Deviant Art before.

Actually, I've had about 4 other accounts. I feel this is the last time I will reinvent my account.


I come to self realization this year.

Not once in my entire life have a felt completely comfortable being myself. Everyone has made me suppress my true side because society may frown upon it. The people we emulate may not like what they see.

The truth is, I don't like what I see in the mirror. I don't recognize myself the majority of the time.

I have weird quirks that no one I know understands.

I have a weird fascination with blood. From the way it creates little pathways on the skin like a maze of exterior veins, to the taste of it. It is our life force. Nothing is more pure, more substantial, more alive.

I'm not masochistic or macabre, but there is a level of pain I enjoy. Every now and then, pain helps me see myself, and reassure me that I am not invisible.

I find the fact that life is so delicate frightening, but also beautiful.

I am religious. I hold to my faith because without it, I don't see a purpose in anything.

I love the thought of angels, especially fallen ones. I don't see a fallen angel as a being fallen from grace, simply misled. I find the symbol of a fallen angel related to us as humans.

I am dark, but on the outside, I shine like a sun. No one
would know that my life isn't picture perfect. And its better that way.

I am not myself. I am who I am silently asked to be. My role is the dependable, loving, effervescent, eternally happy, sun to everyone's rainy day.

I am not myself, but I have become that person.

There is a beauty in anonymity. Here, I can be whomever I choose, and if you don't like it, simply stray from my page.

Here, I am me. Welcome to my world. Take it or Leave it.

-Requiem for Reves


P.s:

A requiem is a chant for the dead. Reves means dreams.

It does not mean all my dreams are dead. Many have died, but many remain.

Hence my I.D:
I host a requiem for the dreams I have lost, in hopes that the ones that remain, will thrive.